First things first. My college career is now outlined (and subject to change at any moment). I am not returning to Evangel and that decision is final. I'm going to be going to Eastfield all year, and then I'll have the summer off as I move to (probably) Denton to attend UNT, my brother's alma mater for two years working solely on my Major and Minor coursework. I'll actually make a surplus this year thanks to my 30+ hrs a week at Whataburger moneywise, so I'll be sitting pretty for the first year at least, and thats if I don't work at all (which I plan to. At least a little bit). So, goodbye Evangel, home of the winningest college football program in Missouri since 1990, and hello UNT, the team that struggles to win even if they score 62 points (11/10/07, Navy 74-62). At least I'm not a total football nut. As far as Texans go.
Next, R. Yes, it is June 23rd. The once-dreaded-yet-now-I-feel-slightly-apathetic-to-it-because-its-not-really-a-big-deal two anniversary. I suppose in the wake of last night (WICKED REFERENCE) it doesn't seem to be that big of a deal. The return of an inspiration was uplifting, to say the least, but I've talked myself back out of it for one reason and one reason alone. As great as R is (and I would say that is probably universal. She is the girl you should WANT to marry. No joke.), she's just not mine. Gah, I suppose I can't avoid it. "(She) could be that (girl), but I'm not that (boy)". (That's two Wicked References in the same paragraph. Averaging one per... oh who am I kidding?) Anyways, now that I count my prayers answered, I want the next round to be come true as well. while a WOW girl is nice, i'd like my WOW girl please. "but does not the Father guide the Son? Not my will but Yours be done!" (And there's a mewithoutYou reference for ya) There is none in sight. To parallel the great love story of Beren and Luthien, these are my wandering/wondering years. (Oh, for the day that I see her dancing among the flowers!)
Next, I find it fair to note that June 24th is my birthday. However, for the second year in a row, I'm spending that birthday flipping burgers for 8 hours, so my parents had the foresight to go ahead and celebrate two days early, which was yesterday (Tuesday). Surprise of all surprises, they got me nosebleeds to see Wicked. A musical. For my birthday. For those who don't know, I'll let a friend who might be able to give some insight on this matter, give some insight on this matter.
"omg! it's soo good!!! i never expected you to be seeing it though... i know you aren't really a musical theatre person! lol have fun!!" - GMM (emphasis mine)
Those are the exact words, framed in quotation marks. I loathe musicals, like Footloose, because I think they trivialize life, and teenagers today do that enough themselves. My school of thought for the past coupla years is that literature should be realistic and didactic (i.e. you learn something from it) I never saw a town banning dancing because the preacher's son got killed in an accident coming back from a party as realistic, and frankly it didn't teach me much either. Anyways, back to the subject, I was kinda so so about going to see it, but "Hey! It's professional theater, so it'll be quality at least." so I thought. Well, got there, and it turns out they have a lottery for "orchestra" seats. So my mom and I entered the lottery (along with 125+ other people) and against all odds I actually won! (better go to Vegas while I'm hot, you know what I'm saying?) "Orchestra Seats" = fourth row, so the view was outstanding, and inexplicably from the first note I was actually on the verge of tears the entire time. Including the ten minute intermission. It was that great of a show. Easily the best theater performance I've born witness to. Overall quality was outstanding. Just... wow. It really was THAT good. And considering I went in with an anti-musical bias, I find this result outstanding. Does this birthday count for 18 and 19? Most definitely yes.
Among other things the show did, and this is all a combination of things moving forward, and looking back one last time happily at the times I've spent with R and what I've learned, the greatest lesson was to perhaps be content. I know at this point I'll be a little restless going forward, and at times I'll wish I had her back (which is basically how it is anyways) but overall I'm embracing contentness.
Because I couldn't quite do it last year, I'm letting go.
"and i'm free-falling into Your arms"
-It Means More to Us Now (than it ever will)
No comments:
Post a Comment